If, at some point, a man is not taking delight in his relationship with God, the problem is not on the side of God, but on the side of the man.
He is not perceiving or responding to the goodness of God, and this is a sign that something is off-kilter.
Now, there are any number of reasons for this.
He might be exhausted and need to catch up on sleep, he might be struggling with a major issue in his life that consumes all his attention, or he may even be tempted by someone to stop focusing on his relationship with God.
These things happen in the normal course of the Christian life, and in these situations, we sometimes need to stop and fix the underlying problem by getting some sleep, resolving the major issue, or stopping listening to the temptation.
There are other times when the problem runs a bit deeper.
St. Basil of Caesarea suggests that this is what happened to Adam when he gave in to temptation in the Garden of Eden.
Adam, according to St. Basil, allowed himself to lose his focus on the good of friendship with God, and in so doing, started to think that relationship could not satisfy him.
He chose to look for satisfaction and comfort in his relationship with Eve, even though that meant ignoring God, and he searched for pleasure in eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge.
He let himself start treating the joy of being with God like any other material pleasure; it was something he could grow tired of, something that was not sufficient in itself.
If, like Adam, we ever start to think that spiritual goods like prayer, acts of faith and hope, or works of charity are unpleasant in themselves, then we are denying the goodness of God.
We are blaming the good God for something that is wrong with us.
It is this decision of the mind that moves us from the suffering of desolation into the sin of acedia.
(One quick note: this does not mean that we cannot judge that a given kind of prayer or meditation is not working for us.
That is a normal, healthy part of discernment. Instead, we are talking about a more universal judgment that all prayer or belief is unpleasant.)
In desolation, the life of union with God no longer delights us or gives us the joy it once did.
We can’t keep our minds on our prayers.
We may even feel a kind of distaste at the idea of meeting with our brotherhood or feel a discomfort in fulfilling spiritual commitments we have previously made.
Noble words about the divine life no longer inflame us like they did.
We haven’t abandoned the spiritual life; rather, in the words of 1960’s pop singers The Righteous Brothers, we’ve “lost that loving feeling.”
Again, the feeling of the desolation is not a sin, but the man who feels this way will be tempted to give into this feeling, to consent with his mind and will to the judgment that friendship with God is not good enough to make him happy.
This is what we must resist with all our might.
Recall, if you can, a moment of great spiritual consolation you have received, a time when you were keenly aware of the goodness of God and his love for you.
Consider the myriad of ways God has showered his goodness on you.
Make an act of hope, renewing your belief in God’s goodness and relying on his help so that you may better cling to that goodness.
Today, ask for God’s grace to resist any temptation to think that his love and friendship are not enough for you.
